Monday, 18 March 2013 23:17

Giving Myself Permission to Change the Rules

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I am still recovering from all the emotional and physical stress of having so many guests around the time of my daughter's birthday, and around the time I was starting my organization transformation. The interruptions and the pulling away from where I needed to go had a bigger impact on me than I expected.


This weekend I finally organized the top of the tall chest of drawers on the left side of the the master bedroom. But the thought of doing more than the surface clutter, and going into the drawers, and possibly the night stands and my closet was very overwhelming. Before, I would just move forward with the drawers and not give it a second thought. But now, I feel anxious when I see something that will be a bit more involved.


So I decided to break down the master bedroom project down in even smaller sections. I know all of it needs to be addressed. But I don't want to go insane in the process. I need to "attack" the clutter in small doses. As small as I need. Maybe one drawer at a time if need be. And it has to be OK to do things this way. I need to tell myself that.


This talk about change in rules and my being overwhelmed brings me to my next point. I do't think I can survive another at-home-birthday-preparation for my son's birthday next month. The second round of Hotel Liz is coming up in a couple of weeks. It is just too much for me right now. I feel so bad about not doing as much as I did for my daughter's birthday! I know that not doing an elaborate birthday is not an indication of me being a bad mother. But I feel  bad about it.


At the same time, I feel like my son would totally enjoy a party at Chuck E Cheeses. He will unlikely be disappointed for not having a birthday party at home.I know it would also be way easier on me. I know it would be less stressful. But I need to give myself the OK to do it. In my heart, this is a difficult decision. An emotional one. But my head tells me this would be the right thing to do now.


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